Advent

Now it feels like Christmastime is upon us!  The Advent Evening last night was beautiful and it snowed an inch and it was a gorgeous day today and I’m listening to Christmas music in front of the fire.  =)

There were about 30 people here last night, despite the weather forecast.  That included three young children who helped with the lighting of the Advent candles and six college students who participated in our dramatic performance.  It was a festive, fulfilling, and filling evening (with quite the pot-luck spread!), and a great thing to be a part of. 

It began with a prophetic reading from Isaiah about God restoring the world to a peaceful and just order, followed by a song calling us to “prepare a way for the Lord”, which Christa and I accompanied with a flute duet.  After the lighting of the candles, I led that most wonderful of Advent hymns “All Earth is Waiting” (toda la tierra). 

The best part of the evening was the dramatic poetry reading by Suzanne: a prayer for a Christian soldier to lay down his arms and leave it all behind.  With a young man sitting on a stool center-stage, Christa did an interpretive dance while the poem was read.  It ended with a few of us holding hands and joining in a song of peace. 

There was a gospel reading, a homily by Brayton, and a ritual that involved lighting candles and sharing what “tools of enmity” we were going to lay down.  As that ended, Christa and I played a hauntingly slow flute duet of “Down by the Riverside.”  The program ended with the another poem, the O Antiphons, and everyone singing “O Come, O Come, Emmanuel.” 

After our souls and spirits were filled, we filled our bodies with delicious food, and then sat around in the living room sharing more music and poetry together until 10:30 at night.       

Happy Adventing, everyone!

awed & astounded

“A tree gives glory to God by being a tree…The more a tree is like itself, the more it is like [God]…This particular tree will give glory to God by spreading out its roots in the earth and raising its branches into the air and the light in a way that no other tree before or after it ever did or will do…

The little yellow flowers that nobody notices on the edge of that road are saints looking up into the face of God. This leaf has its own texture and its own pattern of veins and its own holy shape, and the bass and trout hiding in the deep pools of the river are canonized by their beauty and their strength…Nothing else in the world ever did or ever will imitate God in quite the same way. That is [their] sanctity…

For me to be a saint means to be myself…Trees and animals have no problem. God makes them what they are without consulting them, and they are perfectly satisfied. With us, it is different…”

(Thomas Merton, New Seeds of Contemplation)

Wow. What a glorious Sabbath. A day of sunlight after yesterday’s soaking. A long walk with the saints – trees, leaves, rocks, salamanders, slugs, beavers, birds… I am awed and astounded, enchanted and enamored by God’s amazing, incredible creations. By God, as it were.

Today for church, I went on a four-hour walk to the Quabbin and back. I just love the smell of leaves on the ground after it’s rained, and the quietness of the soft, damp ground under my feet made it easier to listen to the sounds of the woods.

I was surprised and overjoyed and the sight of a small bright orange salamander at my feet, and stopped to watch it cautiously edge off the path into the matching leaves.

I went to say hello to a beautiful old tree and discovered a human-inflicted scar on it. I laid my had on the gash, leaned my forehead against the trunk, and prayed breath and life, compassion, apology, healing. Then something caught my eye, dangling and spinning in the air, curved like a pine needle – what was it? A slug? What kind of slug hangs from a thread? Was it caught? The closer I looked, the more fascinated I became. It was indeed a slug of sorts – very small and skinny, about an inch long. It was hanging upside-down from a “string” attached to a piece of bark about a foot above it, and it was slowly but surely descending. I did not know slugs could do that! I stayed there watching it twist and turn and contort its body to steady itself in the precarious breeze as it oh-so-slowly lowered itself down…finally, 4 feet and at least 15 minutes later, it swung forward and clung to a piece of bark about 6 inches above the ground. I could not help but let out a gasp of incredulity and joy at this amazing feat of nature.

Onward to the Quabbin. I sat on a fallen tree along the shore, just listening and looking, overcome by the beauty and stillness that surrounded me. I immersed myself in it, took my shoes off to feel the cool graininess of the sand, let God bathe me with sunlight and sound. Was that a loon I heard making that haunting cry from across the lake? I could hear each bird as it slipped under the water to search for food, the rhythmic beat of wings overhead, far-off birds twittering in the woods, the sound of branches rustling and snapping as an animal moved through the underbrush. I watched a bird and a beaver cross paths in the water, birds soaring and diving to skim the surface, saw the mist begin to gather at the edges…observed the stillness, the quiet, the goodness, the holiness of it all. Life. God.

“And on the 6th day, God looked at everything that had been created – the land, the waters, the trees and plants, the birds of the air, the creatures of the sea, the land-dwelling animals of all sizes, the humans, everything seen and unseen…and God said it was good. And then God rested.”

Drenched

I went for a walk in the drizzle yesterday, turned my face to the sky, and just stood there for five minutes, letting the raindrops fall on my face, remembering those New York summer storms in which we would run outside, laughing, and get drenched in the wonders of God…

life-work

I love the fact that I was instructed by my “boss” to stop early and not work so hard and wear myself out; that I deserved and needed a break.

“Stop!” She said. “Take a break and rest! Go for a walk in the woods before it rains. It’s not healthy to be stuck in the house all day, you need to get outside! You’ve done enough today – go!”

So go I did – out to the Quabbin to sit on the rocky shore and breathe with the waves and watch the sun set behind the dark hills and windy clouds; to relax my body that was tired of cooking and cleaning; to soothe my mind, rejuvenate my spirit; to connect with the God that is in all and through all; to feel the presence of the Spirit around me and let it fill me.

Being in nature – letting myself be overwhelmed by it – is the best way I know of to connect with God, and if I want to live my life so that everything I do is an expression of my spirituality, then I need to have regular, intentional time in nature.

Here at Agape, that is understood as an integral part of life.

Life here is not about the Job – although there is certainly lots of work to be done! But the goal of life here is life itself. We don’t live in order to work or work in order to live, the way many people do: people who get a job simply so they can pay the bills and, if they earn enough, go enjoy themselves on their time off; people to whom life is meaningless if they can’t prove their worth to their family or society by being employed.

Rather, at Agape the work is a part of life, but the purpose is to be living and practicing a simple, spiritually grounded life, a whole life, that is supported by community and grounded in nature. It’s not about being a “good” worker who will do everything the boss says and beyond, in spite of your opinions about the task you may be assigned, in order to be appreciated and prove your value and maybe even get a raise. The work that happens at Agape is about living your beliefs and witnessing to your convictions and teaching other about how to go and do likewise.

It’s been a while…

Hey people – it’s been a while since I put anything up on this blog, so if that’s the only way you keep up with what I’m doing you would have been completely in the dark since August…sorry! My life has been pretty unsettled, with lots of traveling and decision-making.

After JVC ended, I went back to Philadelphia and stayed with my aunt for a few weeks. Not be able to decide what to do with my life, I decided instead to go on a trip: first to Asheville, North Carolina to visit Leah McCullough (former campus minister at Oregon State) and attend a Carrie Newcomer workshop and concert. Then, I flew to Chicago where I spent 2 and a half days with two good friends from my college days, Tracy and Sarah. From there I took the Megabus to Minneapolis and visited my aunt, uncle, and cousins for a week, along with getting to see a couple college friends and spending a day in Northfield visiting professors and church folk. when that was over, I flew back to Asheville, where I spent a few more weeks at Leah’s house, walking in the “mountains”, and attending a number of interesting lectures (Marcus Borg, Elias Chacour, Shane Claiborne…).

Eventually, I returned to Philadelphia – the first week of October. It was the epic kind of Greyhound bus ride you never want to experience…to put it briefly: delays, overbooked routes, overflow buses, missed connections, and unorganized boarding got me to Philly 7 hours later than I was originally scheduled to arrive…

So there I was, back in Philly again, trying to figure out where to go from there…finally – finally! – I made enough of a decision to put me on the road again, not sure exactly how it would turn out, but happy to be moving on.

And now I’m here at Agape, living in the woods about two miles’ distance from the great Quabbin reservoir. Hiking, reading, praying, working, and mastering the art of driving a stick-shift. Read more about it here.

Happy Me Day!

Tuesday, September 22nd: the autumnal equinox.

I’ve always felt a connection to this day because of my name. I’m happy to claim it and the significance of the season as part of my identity. Not only am I in love with its outward beauty (the smells and the colors), but also the beauty of the metaphors that it contains (dormancy, death bringing new life, metamorphosis…).

Carrie Newcomer puts it this way:

leaves don’t drop, they just let go,

and make a space for seeds to grow.

and every season brings a change,

a tree is what a seed contains,

to die to life is life’s refrain…

timeless

“I should do that-,” the middle-aged black man gestured toward me, “-take my shoes off and walk along the beach. ...But I don’t have time, so I’ll just go look at the water and throw some stones in the lake…”

“The sand is warm,” I said with an encouraging smile.

“Oh really?” He sighed. “I wish I had time, but I’m on my lunch break…”

I continued my slow, meditative stroll down the beach and watched as the white-and-blue uniformed man walked to the water’s edge looked out over the water. He pulled out his camera and took some photos. Then he bent down and started picking up rocks, tossing them one by one out into the aqua-blue waves.

I imagine him breathing deeply of the breezy lake air; drinking in the quiet, the children’s laughter, the seagulls’ calls, the lapping of the waves, the serenity of the scene before him; enjoying a respite in the middle of a busy work day; re-connecting with his spirit in the midst of a spirit-less job.

I know nothing about him except that he did not have time to take off his shoes and socks and wriggle his toes in the warm sand.

And for his sake, I wish he did.

And for our society’s sake I wish everyone did. I wish everyone had that chance to re-fuel our spirits, to remember what it is to be alive and at peace and connected to the world; to remember how important nature is to us and our well-being, so that we would feel the necessity of caring for and being good stewards of the earth; so that we can live whole and holy lives.

We need to make the time.

hiking, hiking, and more hiking

The Appalachian Trail.  30 miles in 3 days.  From Pine Grove Furnace state Park to Blue Ridge Summit, PA.  From Camden, NJ, to our closing retreat dubbed “Dis-Orientation.”  From a year of stable work and community life into the unknown future…

We hiked 13 miles the first day, 10 the second, and 7 the last day.  My feet tried to carry out a mutiny at the end of day two.  But I survived!  All 38 of us did! 

I was so excited to be out in the woods hiking and camping – something I haven’t done all year.  I wasn’t so excited when it rained during the night our first night.  And then in the morning as we were packing and getting ready to go.  We had to ear breakfast and make our lunches inside the Budget truck where our luggage and camping gear was supposed to go because it was pouring.  Luckily, it stopped before we left.  It was a lovely day of hiking.  Not too hot, and the terrain wasn’t too difficult -- although my toes got sore and I could tell how out of shape I was on the few uphills we had!  We ended up at a campground that had a swimming pool and showers – a nice ending to a long day…

Only that wasn’t the end.  *imperative expletive* the rain.  One night of dampness was annoying yet adventuresome, but two nights in a row was just miserable.  The staff helpers had kindly set our tents up early and laid our sleeping bags out in the sunshine to dry from the night before, but nothing had quite dried out completely.  And at 8pm, as everyone was finishing settling into their tents and thinking about s’mores over the campfire, we hear the rumble of thunder and then BOOM!  Downpour.  Escape into our tents.  What was there to do but give each other backrubs?  Just as the worst of it passed over our heads, the person with the truck and bus keys started coming around to ask people if they wanted to go find shelter elsewhere.  When we opened the tent door, we discovered that we were surrounded by an inch-deep lake of water.  Thank goodness for a plastic-bottomed tent!  Others weren’t so fortunate.  They ended up sleeping in the back of the truck, in the bus, and in the foyer of the bathroom building.  Only 14 of us stayed in our tents overnight.  Dan chose to sleep elsewhere, but I just put a plastic tarp over the top of the tent to keep the roof from dripping and managed to stay fairly dry the rest of the night.

The second day of hiking was brutal: it was hillier and rockier, and I got blisters on my pinky toes and the side of my left foot.  :(  I was one of many who hobbled more than walked around camp that evening…but joy of joys it didn’t rain!!! 

The third day wasn’t so bad because the damage had already been done, so I just bandaged my feet up, took some painkillers, loosened my laces, and hiked on…I had to go slow, but it didn’t hurt as much as the day before and it was a short hike – we made it to the trail exit by 11:45am!  We were the first group, so we got to wait and rest an hour for everyone else to get there and then we all walked the last mile up the road to the retreat center together. 

Whew!  I did it!  =D  

It’s the end of the world as we know it…

JVC Camden 08-09 has ended. 

Conor and Megan left a week ago, and Patti, Dan I finished out this last week together just – except that we didn’t really see much of each other…  Patti was really busy all week, and Mom and Dad visited Tuesday through Thursday, so I was somewhat preoccupied as well! 

It was really nice to have them visit, but a little stressful with trying to wrap up work and JVC stuff and spend time with them, too.  But they were really useful in helping me get my oil change taken care of!  They visited me at work on Wednesday afternoon and we dropped my car off at the shop on the way home.  Showed them around the neighborhood when we got home – went down some streets I’d never been on before all year!  Not having the car on Thursday morning meant I got to sleep in and walk to the Camden Children’s Garden to meet my summer camp crew there for our field trip – =)  As they were all getting on the bus to head back to ERLH, Mom and Dad picked me up and drove me to the shop to get my car so I could drive it back to work for the rest of the day.  I dropped my parents off at the airport that evening for their flight to New Hampshire for my aunt’s wedding.

Friday was my last day of work.  It felt kind of weird because we didn’t have a normal schedule and I didn’t really have to do anything at all.  There was a going-away feast for me: chicken, rice, beans, tacos, chips, fruit salad…and apple crisp (made by me).  After all that, a cake was brought out for me, and Cindy had the kids say nice goodbye things to me, which was really sweet (the best one was “thank you for helping me feel better when I was upset”).  After lunch, the kids went outside, and I was summoned over to the management building for another farewell (for me and the law intern) and more cake – which I managed to avoid.  When I got back to the Education Center, some of the kids were already getting ready to go home!  The ones who were left just had free time to play games – and then it started to rain.  And I mean RAIN!  There was a flash flood warning for the area.  And at 4:30, Cindy drove the 4 kids that were still left to their homes…the end. 

I’m really sad to be leaving the kids, especially before the end of the summer program because it feels like I’m deserting them and leaving my work unfinished…so I’m going to miss the kids and watching them grow, but I’m really glad to be done with the job…

Gratitude

Something amazing happened at work today.

The kids were gathering in the back waiting for instructions for their afternoon activity and as soon as I entered the room, Cindy said, "Lanae and Jza'ceir, you are going to go to the library right now with Miss Autumn and she's going to do some mediation between you two."

What? I could hardly believe my ears. Really? She wanted me to do that? I was surprised because she hasn't always been supportive/understanding/confident of my ability to deal with discipline issues. I felt proud because it was a sign that she thought I was capable, and grateful that she was giving me a chance to use the communication skills I've been trying to cultivate. I'm more used to her giving me advice, which often feels like criticism, so her asking me to do that is about the highest praise I've received all year.

saying our farewells

We had our first true community night in about three months last night, and our last one of the year. it was wonderful. Conor is leaving tomorrow and Megan leaves on Saturday, so since they won’t be coming to our closing retreat, I felt like we needed a way to say farewell to each other and reflect on our year together. It was a lovely hour of just reminiscing and sharing and laughing and enjoying each other’s company and our quirks and ups and downs as a community. Despite our mix of contrasting interests, personalities, and backgrounds, we made it through a year together without having any major conflicts and managed to get along for the most part. And that’s something to celebrate!

Comfortable and confident...

As we were cleaning up from the day today, Cindy turned to me and said, “You seem to be a lot more confident and comfortable with this than you were with the HW Club.” And I absolutely agreed with her.

I think there are a number of factors involved. 1) It’s much more similar to the day camp job I had for the last 5 summers, 2) it’s more informal and fun and we can change the plans if we need to because we planned them (we’re not trying to get them to do homework they don’t want to do that someone else told them to do), 3) I was around for the planning of it and I get to be in charge of stuff, so my role in leading the program is very different than it was in the HW Club and I feel like I have more freedom.

I was aware of these differences before Cindy made that comment, and even though it just sounds like a statement of observation, it feels like a compliment, which means a lot because compliments from her have been few and far between this year…

Summer Program Begins!

I’ve just had the best two days of work so far this year: the first two days of the summer program. Yesterday just felt so easy and natural, and today was so much fun! Monday might be a different story since I'll actually have to be teaching lessons, but I’m hoping for the best…

Thursday felt like it went by really fast, even though it was 7 and a half hours with the kids. Today was long, but great: we took a field trip to the historic Peter Mott House (underground railroad) and then swimming. The best part of the day was helping D’Andre overcome his fear of drowning because he couldn’t swim. We spent a lot of time together. It’s unusual to see him so vulnerable and clingy because he usually puts on such a tough, angry exterior. He was still scared to let of me after I got a life jacket for him – but by the time we left he was jumping into the pool by himself and doing twists and swimming around. =) The other best part was giving Jayson’s little brother, who’s 5, a piggy back ride all around the pool for 15 minutes. I guess it was just wonderful to connect and interact with the kids in an informal and fun setting rather than a classroom. =)

Boston!

I just got back from a historic trip to Boston! Historic for two reasons. 1, the obvious: Boston is a historic city. 2, the hysteric: I was visiting a friend I hadn't seen in 14 years! Dorothy and I were best friends in 3rd and 4th grades, but then I moved to Oregon and although we stayed in touch for a while (and Facebook is amazing!), we never saw each other again -- until now! Her younger sister, Delia, who was entering 3rd grade when I moved is now entering her senior year of college at BU and is living with Dorothy for the summer, so I got to see her, too. Here's how it transpired:


Pattie, Megan and I drove up on Friday night after dropping Dan off in NYC and got in at about 12:15 a.m. On Saturday morning, I had nutella on a bagel for breakfast. Nutella! A great start to a great day. :)


Delia had some work to do, so it was just Dorothy and I who set out walking and talking in the morning. We walked from Jamaica Plain down through the university/med. school/hospital area, past the Fenway, across the bridge into Cambridge with its beautiful view of downtown Boston and Beacon Hill, and back across the river where we rested our feet for a while in the Charles River Park. It was an absolutely beautiful day out: sunny, clear skies, 70-75 degrees with a light breeze.

Delia met up with us in the park. On our way out, we stopped by a bunch of tents that were set up and discovered that they were giving away free health food samples! So that was our free lunch... We walked down Charles Street and then throught Boston Commons and past the Paul Revere cemetery to Government Square, where there was a gay pride festival going on.

Next stop was the Old State House. We got there at 4:55. From there we headed to the North End where Dorothy bought a salad and we sat on the wharfs at the waterfront to eat it. And rest. We continued our walk to the Old North Church of Paul Revere fame, and then down to the Paul Revere house (built in 1680!). Before heading back to the subway , we wandered through the Italian neighborhood and stopped at the famous Mike's Pastry, where they bought me a cannoli and the best tiramisu i've had in ages. That place was busy and crowded for a reason!

We were back to Dorothy's by 7:30 and left at 8:30 with one of her friends to get some dinner. It was a beautiful evening, but we were so tired we didn't stay out long. By 10:00 we were back at the house and it didn't take long before we collapsed in bed.

Sunday morning was really low-key. We just lounged around the house (it was kind of dismal and rainy) and then finally went out to get breakfast at a nearby corner store/cafe, and then it was time for Megan and Patti to pick me up and come home!

It was an A+ weekend!

What happens when the boys leave town...

I'll write about Honduras some other time...but today i want to write about more recent things!

Last Saturday was an amazing day!

In the morning I took the PATCO to the Collingswood Farmer's Market and bought some strawberries (which I made into strawberry freezer jam later in the week!) and basil plants and other things.

Back at home, I kneaded the bread I'd started earlier in the morning and set it to rise while I went over to the park for the neighborhood summer bash! There was free food, popcorn and cotton candy, live salsa/merengue music, a bunch of local organizations with tables, and a bunch of activities for kids, including two carnival rides. Megan and Patti ended up staffing the Potty Toss and Tic-Tac-Toe toss for a while...It was a great community celebration and a beautiful day; the park was teeming with people all afternoon. =)

Later, I planted my basil in the garden and finished making the bread. Patience pays off: I ended up with the two most beautiful and perfect loaves of bread I've made this year! =)

Around 7, Megan, Patti, and I (the only ones home for the weekend) decided to be social, so we went out in the back yard, which we share with our neighbors, and entertained (and were entertained by) Monica and Bob's passel of grandkids, who were all visiting. They climbed all over us and played with our hair and begged for piggy-back and shoulder rides. They were also very intrigued by the garden, which was great except that they didn't really understand the concept of how plants grow...the 1-inch high cilantro plants got stepped on at least 3 times (but it survived!), and ZZ (the 2-year-old) managed to pull up some parsley plants and one of my newly planted basil plants - twice! I eventually had to ask Patti to please keep ZZ away from the garden - so that I'd still have a garden left!

At 9:00 the three of us left for a little adventure...There was a New Kids On the Block concert at the Susquehanna Bank Center (f.k.a. the Tweeter Center) down on the waterfront, and they wanted to go -- dressed in lovely outfits they'd made from the NKOTB sheets we found when we moved into our house... So we walked down there, stopping at the new Rita's Water Ice on the way and having a brief chat with the Mormon missionaries who were playing baseball in the parking lot.

When we got to the SBC, we strolled along the waterfront with its beautiful view of downtown Philly and took pictures in front of the Battleship NJ (gag) and danced and listened to the music for a bit. But then the music stopped all of a sudden in the middle of a song. And then the band started leading the audience in a chant that went something like "I don't who broke it but they better fix this ****. We're not leaving til they fix this ****." So we left.

On the way back, we stopped at a cool water fountain with colored lights that we had walked past on the way there and played in it for a while. =) When we were done with that, and Megan and Patti were thoroughly soaked, we walked to McDonald's for a late-night snack. Unfortately, they were closed, and you can't walk through the drive-thru. So that was that. We headed home. Just after we crossed the bridge into North Camden, a friendly police man pulled up next to us and asked us where we were going. you see, "there's a concert and stuff going on tonight and sometimes people come for these things and think they're going somewhere, but they don't know where they're going..." We weren't lost, just crazy...

Before we got home, there was one more stop: Kristen was out on the porch of the Mission Year volunteer house, so we stopped and talked to them for a while. We got home at 11:30 and had our snacks. I made buckwheat pancakes and set off the smoke detector at midnight...

The End

Honduras!

I'm off to Honduras for a week to visit my sister with my parents and my aunt! =)

Silent Retreat

I’ve really enjoyed this retreat. I was so ready for it: I needed to get in touch with me again – I’ve been spending so much time with people who are different from me (i.e. my housemates), that I haven’t really expressed myself much and haven’t really been the Me that I know is in there…

For being a "silent retreat", there was less silence and more sound than I was expecting. The silence started on Friday night and ended before dinner on Sunday. And during it, there were opportunities for activities that involved listening to other people talk and listenting to music or singing (guided prayer, yoga, Taize, music at mealtimes...) Plus, the three meetings with my spiritual director.

One of the spiritual directors this weekend was a young woman who had just returned from El Salvador. She’s 27 and in her first year as a novice. When she introduced herself the first night, I just had to talk to her, what with the El Salvador connection and the novice/same age as my sister thing...

I had a great spiritual director who asked good questions and was easy to talk to and let me not say anything. Would I consider myself a Christian? How would I name my spirituality? Am I asking the right question [in prayer] – what do I really want to know? Why is making time to connect with God in the middle of my day important to me?

I got to walk in the woods, climb trees, listen to my thoughts, and reconnect with my spirituality. there were rhododendrons and evergreens, including cedars, and giant poplars and oaks and maples. and birds and woodpeckers. I got a sunburn, too…

The only problem with retreats is that I get to spend time with other JVs who are a lot more like me and it makes me wish they were my housemates…

I have a garden!

My dream of having a garden in our backyard has come true! Over the last few weeks, I've been working on building beds, getting supplies together, and buying seeds. Now I have an L-shaped garden a foot and a half wide, each leg about 5-6 feet long. So far I've planted snow and snap peas, lettuce and spinach, and parsley. There's more to come... It's so exciting! But waiting for things to grow takes a lot of patience -- now that it's in the ground, I just want it to grow! Now! =)

tired

I went to bed last night feeling weary, tired, worn out, and not wanting to go back to work. That didn’t really change until the kids shows up for HW Club, which is ironic because that’s the part I was dreading…

I haven’t decided if I like the new hole in the wall yet, but it wasn’t as bad as I was afraid it might be. I actually left work feeling more awake and at peace than I had when I got there.

Tony Campolo

tonight Dan and I went to hear Tony Campolo speak at St. Joe’s Pro Cathedral. It was the annual Romero Center Peace & Justice Lecture. He talked (or preached, as it were) about the Christian call to build the Kingdom of God on earth and what that looks like. It’s a familiar message I’ve heard many times before, but he delivered it very well, with humor and animation.

It was funny to realize that I was the only one in my house who had heard of him before – he’s not Catholic… I was pretty impressed that the Romero Center got him as a speaker because he's pretty famous (in ceratin circles...), but then I learned that he was born and raised in Philadelphia and still lives and teaches there, so it probably wasn't too hard.

a series of unfortunate events, maybe

two unfortunate things happened at work this week while the kids were out on spring break.

1) we got a new internet provider and with it came new network firewalls, including facebook and chat. So, no more facebook during my lunch break or msn messenger…gchat still seems to work from my email page, though.

2) half the wall was taken out between the two classrooms. it’s a 4-foot wide doorway with no door. I’m worried it will leave me feeling more nervous and less free to do what I want…more evaluation from cindy, less courage for me…we’ll see what happens when the kids come back…

Triduum

Thursday evening I went to a Maundy Thursday service at Tioga UMC in North Philly. It was a cooperative service with St. George’s UMC and other UMC’s in the “Central Cluster”, which are all African-American congregations. Of the approximately 50 people there, I was one of only two white people in the congregation. The only others were the two St. George’s pastors and the pianist. It was a 7:00 service. It got under way at about 7:30. I didn’t stay until the end, because we were having a Seder meal at home, planned for about 8:30…well, I left the church at about 8:40, seeing that the service wasn’t going to end at least until 9. I couldn’t leave before that, because I had to stay for the foot washing – that’s the whole reason I went to the service! That’s my favorite thing about Maundy Thursday services. So I snuck out during the offering.

The Seder was nice. Megan did a good job of preparing the meal and leading us through an abbreviated version of it. We even included the Matzo hide-and-seek! =) And after we were done and we were still sitting there talking, I looked at the clock and discovered it was 11:30PM. Good thing we all had Friday off…

Friday morning I participated in the viacrusis with Sacred Heart parish in South Camden. It was cool. Each station was a place in the neighborhood where someone had been killed within the past 10 years or so. Fr. Doyle would explain who had died and how and then there’d be a scripture and response and prayer before we moved on. I helped Sean Dougherty (Patti’s boss) carry the cross between stations 9 and 10. I’d never had that experience before (never even been on a viacrusis before), so I was glad he asked. I shouldered it and he took the rear. It was heavy, and I got a sore shoulder, but it was bearable. Hard, but I didn’t mind – it was a good feeling.

In the evening I went to a tenebrae service at Grace Lutheran. It was exactly what I wanted and needed: calm, reflective, quiet, serious.

Saturday, appropriately, was dreary and rainy.

Sunday was cold and windy, but clear and sunny! I went to Chestnut Hill UMC for church. It was amazing to see the sanctuary practically full, and it felt awesome! There were at least twice as many people there as usual (like 60 instead of 30). It felt very homey, especially since they ended service with the choir singing the Hallelujah chorus, like Macalester-Plymouth* does. The format of worship was pretty standard and didn’t include anything radical, but the content was just as awesome as usual.

And in the afternoon, I started making a garden in my back yard…how appropriate for Easter!

*The church I attended Easter services at with my aunt and uncle in St. Paul, MN during college.

Good Friday reflections...

I have to say, I kind of like the character of Pilate in the Passion story, especially in John. He’s a state official who’s entrapped by the law and doesn’t have the courage to step out of his box. He does what he’s “supposed to do” and doesn’t feel like he has a choice – if he does otherwise, his career, his life, as he knows it, will be over. John shows better than the other gospels how pained and tormented he is at the thought of putting Jesus to death – this man who is quiet and humble and innocent and intriguing, who reveals the truth. “what is truth?” he asks… He likes Jesus and doesn’t want to have anything to do with his death. He tries to hand him back to the Jewish authorities, but they’re too concerned about Sabbath law to let themselves become unclean by killing him.

Pilate only gives in when they connect Jesus’ claim to be King to treason against Caesar, when they make it political. The poor guy, so trapped! in the system…like so many of us today… And I love how at the end he gets back at the Jewish authorities by writing “King of the Jews” in three languages on the sign and refuses to change it when they complain – so there!

So it’s Good Friday and Jesus has died. Been crucified for speaking a world-altering truth. Even if that’s where the story ended, it would be earth-shattering and transforming. That story could hold its own, with all the wisdom and teaching it contains. That’s how people who aren’t Christians read it, like Gandhi. So why do we need Easter? What does it add to the story that wouldn’t be there without it? I suppose Christianity might not exist if it did end there…hmm, have to think on that one…We don’t need Easter to tell us how to live – Jesus’ life and teachings do that. But we need it to give us hope and courage; to reassure us that we’re not alone, that it’s not a lost cause…

bread and church

yesterday, I tried to make bread again, and failed again because it didn’t rise, again…what am I doing wrong? maybe i’m just too impatient…but i made applesauce tonight with the shriveled apples that have been in the fridge for months, and it came out yummy!

this morning i went to Grace Lutheran again. It’s such a funny little church. apparently church does officially begin at 10:15, not 10 like the sign says, which is a good thing, since I got there at about ten after…

I wish I had a church that I could feel like was my church, and have that community and outlet…

John Dear

Tonight, Megan and I went to a lecture by John Dear, SJ. He’s a pretty radical Jesuit peace activist who’s written a lot of books, one of which I read for a research paper I wrote my senior year of college. For some reason I thought he was of the older generation – because he’s done so much – like in his 60s at least, and small like Jon Sobrino… So you can imagine my shock when this John Edwards-esque baby-faced 49-year-old walked up to the podium and started talking. er, preaching.

He’s a very dynamic speaker, and funny. and very bold. I really liked what he had to say, but I was a little self-conscious being there with Megan, knowing that a number of the things he said probably made her a little uncomfortable, so it was hard to be totally enthusiastic. He was obviously “preaching to the choir” and so he didn’t temper his tone at all. But it seems to me that people preaching a message like his about radical nonviolence, talking about how we need to practice peace within ourselves and within the world and speak out against violence need to deliver it in a way that will allow skeptics to hear it, rather than feel like they’re being attacked and get defensive.

Lenten Practices

Back in February, we had a community conversation about Lent and any traditions we had, such as doing daily devotions or giving something up and our thoughts about it. I have never "given something up" for Lent, because I always thought it just seemed shallow and didn't really have anything to do with preparing for Easter as far as I could tell. For the last few years, I've tried to do something deeper: stop a harmful behavior, adopt a practice or habit to make my life reflect my ideals... I was struggling to come up with something concrete to do this year, until I went to Chestnut Hill UMC the first Sunday of Lent. They had us reflect on different aspects of our life (self-care, spirituality, relationships, justice, creativity, and gifts/talents) and choose something. Here's what I came up with:

1) morning reflection/prayer
2) relationships w/community members
3) involvement in neighborhood/community
4) weekly mandalas
5) begin a garden
6) more intentionality about choices that affect the environment
7) improve how I relate to the kids, teens, and Cindy at work
8) breathe and notice

I have to say, I haven't done morning reflections every day, I haven't made a single Mandala yet, and I haven't put enough effort into #2. I've been thinking a lot about #s 3 and 5 -- and I checked out some gardening books from the library! I think I've been making improvements in all the other areas... #8 is harder than it sounds, but it's the one that has the biggest effect on my day. I've got 3 weeks left, let's see how much more progress I can make!

spring cleaning

Cindy and I spent the day cleaning, sorting, and rearranging. Must be spring cleaning time! The shelves in my office that hold games and supplies are much better organized now – we’ll see how long that lasts! The library has had almost a total transformation. Basically, we took all the books off of all the shelves, piled them in the middle of the floor, moved the bookcases to a different wall, and then sorted through the books and put most of them back on the shelves. For a while it looked like a hurricane had swept through the room, but now it is cleaner and more spacious than it’s been since I got here! We expect to be getting one or two new bookcases pretty soon, made by Cindy’s husband, so we had to make space for them.

But if it’s the first day of spring, why did so many people wake up to a light dusting of snow on the ground?

a long week...

this week has felt so long…today should have been Friday. In fact, yesterday should have been Friday! sigh.

On Monday, we had our first community night in about two weeks, which was really nice: we’ve been really scattered lately it feels and our community has felt pretty disconnected. We’ll see if anything comes of the discussion…

On Tuesday, I had to break up a fight between two boys – 2^nd and 3^rd grade. They were friends, too! And it all started over some stolen pieces of CookieCrisp: S got mad about it and stole Z’s picture. He wouldn’t give it back, so Z pushed him, and S punched back. That’s when I got in between them to stop it and keep them apart from each other. It was pretty intense – probably the most intense moment I’ve had all year in terms of adrenaline, even including the two days when I had to run the homework club by myself. The good thing is, when we brought their moms in to talk about it with them, there was no angry threatening language used toward the kids, and the resolution was not harsh punishment but rather an agreement between the boys that they were going to be friends, not enemies.

To celebrate St. Patty’s Day that night, we went over to the Philly house and had dinner with them and then went out to a bar in Old City. It wasn’t too crazy since it was a weeknight, although I didn’t get to bed until 2am…

Yesterday was fine, but I was super tired all day today, and didn’t have much patience for the kids. They kept on coming up to me and tattling on all the misbehavior that was going on: he said this to her, she used this word, she did this to him, he said this… most of these occurrences were happening in other rooms and not to the kids who were reporting it. I was trying to help kids do their homework, and my only reaction was to want to shout “I don’t care, stop bugging me!” I didn’t, but I was seriously annoyed. Once I got home, I just sat on the couch all evening feeling like a despondent lump and watched TV.

Thank goodness tomorrow is Friday.

Nor-easter

Big snow storm last night – a true “Nor-Easter”. Dumped about 5 inches on us here in Camden, more in other places. Pretty much every single school in South Jersey and Southeast PA was closed today. Cindy called in the morning to tell me she wasn't going to work today, so I decided to wait at least until it stopped snowing and the wind let up and the roads were better. Finally decided at 1:30 that there was no reason for me not to go in, but I was tired of sitting around. I made to the office at about 2:00 and left again at 4:15 so I wouldn't have to drive in the dark. Megan and I cooked up an Indian feast for dinner tonight: lentil dal, curried vegetables, basmati rice, banana raita...it all turned out great except for the chaptis...

EPIC

Wow, Dan Megan and I just played an EPIC three-hour game of Trivial Pursuit! It was awesome. It was nice to kind of let loose and just be my silly self and to let Megan see that side of me.

Catchphrase w/Consequences

We had a community night on Wednesday and played Catchphrase with Consequences. The rules were that the person holding it when the time ran out had to do whatever it was the previous person had chosen, such as tell a story/share a fact, do a chore, etc. It was mostly fun and interesting, except when I got stuck with my own consequences 4 times! Then we made beer bread with the leftover beer from the Valentine’s party and I put twice as much baking powder in as I was supposed to – oops...

Valentine's Visit

Happy Birthday to my big sister Prairie!

The V-Day party was pretty fun, and there were no calamities. There were probably about 50 people here over the course of the night: Jenn came up with the Baltimore JVs, Conor, Megan, and Patti all had friends visiting, the German volunteers came, some St. Joe’s students, and a bunch of JVs. We made Jambalaya, cupcakes, hummus, and spinach-artichoke dip, which I can proudly claim was the hit of the night! I stayed out of the basement for the most part – it was too loud, crowded, and stinky. My room was the “safe haven” for the people who wanted to go to bed “early” (a.k.a. 1am), including me.

This morning, Jenn and I got up at 9am and headed off to Grace Lutheran Church after eating some pancakes. It's about two blocks from our house. I’ve been wanting to go there for a while because I know that the church has a history of being really involved in the city’s social justice movements. We got there a little after 10, but the sanctuary was practically empty. People gradually trickled in, and the pastor finally showed up around 10:15, apologizing for being “later than usual.” I loved the service, though – there was so much music, and I knew almost all of it! =) Pastor Margaret is a good preacher, too, and I was genuinely impressed to hear her include gays and lesbians in her list of “everyone that God loves.” She’s African-American, as is the majority of the congregation, but there were quite a few Hispanics and a smattering of white people as well. They were pretty excited that Jenn was an LVC-er, because apparently one of its founders was from that church.

After church, we met Marié in downtown Philadelphia, ate lunch at Reading Terminal Market, and strolled down the Ben Franklin Parkway in the breezy sunshine. It was fun to spend a day being a tourist, but I couldn’t get over the absurdity of the three of us Methodists from Oregon meeting up in Philly…

highs and lows

Saturday was a great day with a bad ending.

We got up late and made a big brunch as a community (I made coffee cake) and then went on a community shopping spree to Costco and the Dollar Tree for household and Valentine’s party supplies. (Every JV community is assigned a holiday, and we’re the hosts of this one). Plus, I found myself a digital camera – hooray! It was a beautiful and sunny 70-degree day. (yep, 5 days after that snow storm...)

In the evening, we went to McGillin’s Pub in Philly (apparently, it’s the oldest one) to watch a Gonzaga basketball game. I had a fine time until midnight came around and I realized no one was ready to leave except me. I couldn’t leave because we hadn’t driven and it wouldn’t have been safe to come home by myself, so I sat there feeling bored, tired, impatient, and on the verge of tears for the next hour until the others were ready to leave. At one point I put my head down on the table to try to rest, but an employee warned me that she’d have to kick me out if I didn’t sit up (yes, that would make two times!...). Maybe I should have let her kick me out so that everyone would have left with me...

It was probably the most miserable experience I’ve had all year, and everyone knows it, so hopefully we'll be able to avoid that situation in the future...

snow =)

We finally had some really real snow and it was lovely! It snowed all day Tuesday and Megan and Patti built a snowman in our back yard, and then it snowed some more overnight for a total of 6-8 inches! It was beautiful, and much better than that slushy/icy stuff we had before...

frustration

Aren’t you supposed to come back from a retreat feeling refreshed and relaxed? But no, I was completely wiped out. It was great to see everybody again for the first time since August and it was lots of fun, but I didn’t get enough sleep. We had a couple really good community bonding and sharing moments, and the speakers and reflections got me reconnected, re-motivated, recommitted to the JVC values.

But since getting back, I’ve been feeling annoyed, frustrated, lonely, bored, and just generally unhappy with my community. We haven’t continued any of the conversations we started at retreat, nothing has changed – in fact, we haven’t even had a community or spirituality night since we got back.

I’m feeling alone in the challenge to seriously and intentionally live into the values of simplicity, social justice, community, and spirituality. It’s not because the others don’t care about those things, but they’re all at really different places in their lives than I am and I have a lot more experience with them than anyone else in my house. They're all exploring these things as a way of life for the first time, whereas I chose them because I knew it's how I wanted to live. I just have to learn to live with it...and be patient...and look for something I can do next year that will feel more serious to me...

speak the truth

A reflection while on retreat:

“Life is the opportunity to speak one great truth in the face of one great lie. It may seem that no one hears it. It may seem that nothing changes. But not to speak – that is the real sin.” --Joan Chittister, in "Called to Question"

I feel like I have missed so many opportunities already in my life…what truth(s) can I speak in the next few months?

Happy Obama (er, I mean Inauguration) Day!

I used my comp time to take the morning off of work and go to Philly to watch The Inauguration. It was cold, but in solidarity with my housemate and all the other people in DC I decided to stand outside on the Independence Mall to watch it with about 1,000 others rather than find a place indoors.

It was awesome. Everyone was so excited and we all cheered whenever Obama appeared on the big screen. At the exact moment when he emerged from the Capitol and began walking down the steps, a flock of birds lifted off from the ground behind the screen and flew up and past it – quite the symbolism of peace and hope, if you ask me. As he finished the oath of office, my chest was just filled with this rising, bursting exhilarating feeling. Everyone cheered, and we couldn’t help but give each other hugs we were so happy! It was a great day.

Hooray for us! It’s so exciting to finally have a new – and wonderful – president!

Never use this pick-up line

*notice: this post contains swear words*

As I’m walking home through the 6th St. tunnel, a young black man about my age enters on his bike. He rides towards me as says “Hey, this is a stick-up. Give me all your money right now so I don’t have to hurt you” (or something to that effect). I stop, and my left hand moves questioningly to my bag as thoughts tumble thought my mind in rapid succession: Shit. Is this really happening? I’ve got like 20 bucks! And I know that the only thing to do is to give it to him. Damn. Well, I will if I have to. Does he really mean it? He’s not threatening me, he’s not even close to me yet. This is weird…
I stand still, my pulse accelerated, waiting for him to get closer, wondering what to do, what he’ll do, with a shocked and befuddled expression on my face. The next words out of his mouth are “Psych! Just kidding.” As he glides past me on his bike he exclaims, “Happy Martin Luther King day!”
Relieved, I laugh weakly and wish him a happy MLK day, too, as I continue walking, then turn toward him around and make some awkward comment about how I’d the stick-up was little absurd because he didn’t have a weapon.
Next thing I know, he dumps his bike on the ground and comes jogging back toward me. “Hey, what’s your name?” I tell him, and he tells me his, although I promptly forget it. We shake hands, he gives me a hug, side kiss included, and he wishes me a happy MLK day again.
I have barely begun walking again when he asks, “Are you a student at Rutgers?”
“Actually, no.”
“Oh. Well, you’re really cute. Can I get your number?”
In my head I’m screaming ack! noooo! why me? I reply, “Sorry man, I don’t think so” and continue walking again.
“Aw, why not? You seem really nice. I’d just like to get to know you, take you out to dinner or something…”
I make my i-hate-to-let-you-down-but-i’m-really-not-sure-about-this-and-i-really-don’t-think-so face and he launches into an explanation about how he’s a student at Rutgers and this and that and how he got in an accident on his bike a few years back (here he rolls up his right pant leg to show me the damage) and how he gets insurance/settlement payments or something because of it, and he’s getting one soon, and how he’s gonna buy a house, and how he’ll be able to take me out and pay for everything and treat me well, etc…
By now we’ve reached the end of the tunnel. I tell him, “Sounds like you’re doing really well, that’s great to hear. But I’m not going to give you my number.”
“Look, I’m a nice guy, I’ve got money, I just want to take you out on a date. Please?”
“No…I’m glad to hear things are going so well for you and I think it’s great, but, no, not today.”
I keep walking. There is a pause. Then, “Is it because I’m black?”
I spin around to face him again. “No! Not at all! It’s just, I’m not looking for that in my life right now, and I’m not at a place in my life where I’m ready for it.”
I look at him apologetically and am relieved when he doesn’t pursue it any further, just gives me another hug and side kiss (I’m glad I’ve got my hat and scarf on, because it was longer than a casual peck and otherwise it would have made me very uncomfortable). We wish each other happy MLK days (again!) and go our separate ways.
Whew! Now that’s one pick-up line I’ve never heard, and never hope to hear again.
And I’m lucky. This is Camden. It could easily have been real.

FJV weekend

We had a full house this weekend!

On Friday, 5 of the 6 Camden JVs from last year converged on our house. Becca came to ERLH in the afternoon and was there for HW Club, and the plan was to meet everyone else at Hank’s, our usual Friday night dinner hangout. But we had to get there first, which turned out to be much more complicated than usual.

The Contour apparently doesn’t agree with Becca very much because she had lots of problems with it last year and it broke down on us on the way home. ;) I had been worrying about it since the day before because it needed an oil change, the check engine light had been on for a few days, and when I started it or went really slow it felt like it was going to turn off. Well, that’s what it finally did when I stopped at the intersection. Worse than that, the brake pedal got stuck and would not go down any farther. I managed to drive it with my flashers on to the Moorestown Pepboys, which was 3 stoplights away, without having to stop the car or brake quickly. Phew! Kevin and Charlie drove out to pick us up and take us back to Hank’s – we got there at 7:30.

On Saturday they went grocery shopping and come home and made us a delicious dinner with salmon – yum! On Sunday afternoon, we picked up the Contour: $875! They had to replace the idle plug and the front brakes plus a few other minor things including a wire tune-up. Wow. Glad I didn’t have to pay for it! Later, we all went to a co-worker’s house and enjoyed some good Puerto Rican food, two cute puppies, and another football game (this time with an unhappy ending for the Eagles).

By the time I got up on Monday morning, Becca was the only one left, so we spent the morning together talking. It was great to talk with someone who understands exactly what I’m going through at work and to discover that we have a lot more in common besides that!

A HW Club story

Little D tried to run away today because he wanted snack. He even got out the door and down the steps. I told him it was OK if he wanted to leave, but he needed to call his mom first. He came inside and I tried to hand him the phone, but he said he’d stay – if I gave him snack. So I explained to him why he hadn’t been allowed to have snack (he didn't have his shoes on and he was running around and being loud). Then I had him explain it to me. He said he was going to leave, I said he had to call his mom, he said he would stay if he had snack. I said he had lost his chance for snack today, but he gets a new chance every day to show that he can behave/follow instructions and get snack. But the consequence of his behavior today was no snack. He started to cry. I left the room, saying if he wanted to go home he could call his mom.

Cindy went to talk to him and came back saying she had told him that if he apologized to me (for what, being obstinate?) he could have snack. Next thing I see is him with his jacket and backpack on headed toward the door. Not leaving, just waiting. He hadn’t called his mom. I asked him what it was Mrs. Cindy wanted him to apologize to me for anyway. He didn’t answer. He tried to go out the door. I locked it and tried to give him the phone again. He took his jacket and backpack off. There was a picture of MLK on the table. I asked him if he knew who it was and if he knew anything about him. We talked for about 5 minutes: I was impressed at how much he knew! I asked if he was ready to go back in the other room with everyone else – If you give me snack! Would you like a poptart? No, popcorn. I already put the popcorn away, but if you’d like a poptart you may have one. No. Strawberry or Cinnamon-sugar? Strawberry. OK. Done.

I’m a little frustrated because I ended up giving in, but: he hadn’t actually done anything that bad, plus, he wanted to stay. I was just trying to be consistent and follow through on my consequence (because I often get the feeling that Cindy thinks I'm too soft or wishy-washy with the kids), even though I didn’t really want to -- when I had warned him, I hadn't meant it to be an ultimatum, but the other kids had interpreted it that way and would have thought I was being wishy-washy and going back on my word if I'd given him snack. So I was relieved that Cindy gave me a way out of it, but also in some small way kind of wished she hadn't...

living and growing together

What a happy and community-filled weekend it’s been!

Friday night we hung out in the basement with the hookah and had some good conversations. On Saturday morning, I decided I didn’t really want any of the breakfast options that were available and neither did I want to get stuck in the house all day like I did last week. So, decision: take the PATCO to Philly, walk to Reading Terminal Market, and get a hot apple dumpling from the Amish. So I did – yum! I also got a latté, and sat at a little table near the 12th Street windows and read the City Pages. Ahhh.

Then I wandered around the market some more and bought some cheap pure maple syrup at another Amish stand – it was from Pennsylvania and half the price of what that amount of syrup usually costs. Hooray! On my way out, I couldn’t resist the 99 cent/lb fuji apples and local cameos, so I bought 4. My bag was rather heavy on the way home, but it was worth it.

I walked through the underground Market East Station mall on my way back to the PATCO. I got to the stop just as a train was arriving, so I checked the direction sign and hopped on it, forgetting that West was not the direction I wanted to go until we came to the next stop…oops! So I got off and waited 20 more minutes for the next train East. I decided to be interesting and get off at the Broadway station in Camden instead of at City Hall – it made the walk home 4 blocks longer, but I got to walk through a different part of town, which I enjoyed.

I made turkey and dumpling soup for dinner on Saturday just cuz I felt like cookin’, which we all ate in the living room together while the football game was on. Later, there was more hookah-ing and conversation.

Today was really cool. 4 of us went to mass across the street at Holy Name this morning at 9. When we got back, we all jumped on Dan’s bed to wake him up so that we could go out to breakfast at Honey’s Sit & Eat in Philadelphia. It’s a really popular breakfast place, so we had to wait 45 minutes after putting our name on the list before we could be seated. Conveniently, the Random Tea Room is just down the block, so we waited there and enjoyed some chai until they radioed down for us. Honey’s is rustic and cozy and delicious: I had the French toast with nutella, strawberries and pears.

We left at 12:30 and drove to the art museum, which is pay-what-you-can on Sundays, and spent about an hour there, then came home just in time to watch the Eagles vs. Giants football game. That's the 4th football game I've watched in the last 8 days. Never in my life did expect to watch so much football... At least the Eagles won.

Sunday morning

I think today made up for yesterday.

I got up at 10 and took the PATCO into Philly. Walked 5 blocks to Arch St. UMC. It was nice. They are a diverse and progressive church, even if not all of their theological language lines up with that. They’re really active in the community too, and have lots of interesting stuff going on. And they have great music! I was almost ready to jump in with both feet, but Philly isn’t my home, Camden is. I want a church like that in Camden. (But why were the black people only sitting in the back half of the sanctuary? There were white people in the back, too, but no black people up front. Weird.)

Afterwards, I stopped in at 10,000 Villages to use my gift card – I bought a "Simply in Season" cookbook and a dark chocolate bar. Mmmm.

Cabin Fever

Another beautiful Saturday in which I stayed home and did nothing. I wanted to go out, but I didn’t have anywhere to go! I’ve lived here for 4 months and still have no idea about what’s here…I want a church. I want to know Camden and its people. I don’t want to be an aloof observer.

Christmas

Merry Christmas! Although I did not fly home to Oregon, I did get to spend the holiday with family: the Hall aunts, uncles, and cousins. I spent Christmas day at my aunt’s house in Philadelphia with my cousin Amity who I hadn’t seen for 4 ½ years, her boyfriend, and my uncle Scott. The Christmas Eve service was nice, but marred by too much incense and too slow of songs. I was the first “kid” up on Christmas morning which meant I got to finish decorating the little tiny tree. We had eggnog and my homemade orange break for breakfast – it’s not Christmas without them!

That weekend we took a road trip up to New England. First stop was Massachusetts to visit my cousin Jon (who I hadn’t seen in 11 years) and his family: we spent a fun evening at their house and celebrated Hanukkah with them – his two girls are 8 and 4(?) and I’d never met them before. Rita, the youngest, is deaf and she’s a riot – she was teaching us sign language and being very dramatic. We spent the night in the big old farmhouse in New Hampshire where Scott lives.

Sunday, we continued on our way to Maine and spent 2 days at my cousin Meredith’s house outside of Portland. I hadn’t seen her in 13 years and had never met her daughters, either, who are 6 and 4(?). We got to spend time with my aunt Lenore and her fiancée Bill while we were there, too. In the late afternoon we all went down to the shore. It was a warm, clear day (55 degrees in Maine in December??), and a beautiful view as the sun began to set.

Monday morning was spent sitting at the dining room table with one little girl on each knee as they drew and colored and played. It was lovely. In the evening, Bill, Lenore, Lark and I took the girls to a restaurant/bar in Portland where Bill’s son-in-law was performing. Sarah really didn’t want to go at first because she was tired, but after she’d eaten and woken up she had fun. By the end, she and Libby were both dancing to the music and didn’t want to leave. After taking them home we went and visited Bill’s house and then stopped at LL Bean on our way back to Meredith’s.

Lark and I left Tuesday morning and drove the whole 8-9 hours back to Philly in one day. It was a great trip, and I especially enjoyed being able to hang out with the children in a family setting rather than a professional one and give them hugs and hold them on my lap.