bread and church

yesterday, I tried to make bread again, and failed again because it didn’t rise, again…what am I doing wrong? maybe i’m just too impatient…but i made applesauce tonight with the shriveled apples that have been in the fridge for months, and it came out yummy!

this morning i went to Grace Lutheran again. It’s such a funny little church. apparently church does officially begin at 10:15, not 10 like the sign says, which is a good thing, since I got there at about ten after…

I wish I had a church that I could feel like was my church, and have that community and outlet…

John Dear

Tonight, Megan and I went to a lecture by John Dear, SJ. He’s a pretty radical Jesuit peace activist who’s written a lot of books, one of which I read for a research paper I wrote my senior year of college. For some reason I thought he was of the older generation – because he’s done so much – like in his 60s at least, and small like Jon Sobrino… So you can imagine my shock when this John Edwards-esque baby-faced 49-year-old walked up to the podium and started talking. er, preaching.

He’s a very dynamic speaker, and funny. and very bold. I really liked what he had to say, but I was a little self-conscious being there with Megan, knowing that a number of the things he said probably made her a little uncomfortable, so it was hard to be totally enthusiastic. He was obviously “preaching to the choir” and so he didn’t temper his tone at all. But it seems to me that people preaching a message like his about radical nonviolence, talking about how we need to practice peace within ourselves and within the world and speak out against violence need to deliver it in a way that will allow skeptics to hear it, rather than feel like they’re being attacked and get defensive.

Lenten Practices

Back in February, we had a community conversation about Lent and any traditions we had, such as doing daily devotions or giving something up and our thoughts about it. I have never "given something up" for Lent, because I always thought it just seemed shallow and didn't really have anything to do with preparing for Easter as far as I could tell. For the last few years, I've tried to do something deeper: stop a harmful behavior, adopt a practice or habit to make my life reflect my ideals... I was struggling to come up with something concrete to do this year, until I went to Chestnut Hill UMC the first Sunday of Lent. They had us reflect on different aspects of our life (self-care, spirituality, relationships, justice, creativity, and gifts/talents) and choose something. Here's what I came up with:

1) morning reflection/prayer
2) relationships w/community members
3) involvement in neighborhood/community
4) weekly mandalas
5) begin a garden
6) more intentionality about choices that affect the environment
7) improve how I relate to the kids, teens, and Cindy at work
8) breathe and notice

I have to say, I haven't done morning reflections every day, I haven't made a single Mandala yet, and I haven't put enough effort into #2. I've been thinking a lot about #s 3 and 5 -- and I checked out some gardening books from the library! I think I've been making improvements in all the other areas... #8 is harder than it sounds, but it's the one that has the biggest effect on my day. I've got 3 weeks left, let's see how much more progress I can make!

spring cleaning

Cindy and I spent the day cleaning, sorting, and rearranging. Must be spring cleaning time! The shelves in my office that hold games and supplies are much better organized now – we’ll see how long that lasts! The library has had almost a total transformation. Basically, we took all the books off of all the shelves, piled them in the middle of the floor, moved the bookcases to a different wall, and then sorted through the books and put most of them back on the shelves. For a while it looked like a hurricane had swept through the room, but now it is cleaner and more spacious than it’s been since I got here! We expect to be getting one or two new bookcases pretty soon, made by Cindy’s husband, so we had to make space for them.

But if it’s the first day of spring, why did so many people wake up to a light dusting of snow on the ground?

a long week...

this week has felt so long…today should have been Friday. In fact, yesterday should have been Friday! sigh.

On Monday, we had our first community night in about two weeks, which was really nice: we’ve been really scattered lately it feels and our community has felt pretty disconnected. We’ll see if anything comes of the discussion…

On Tuesday, I had to break up a fight between two boys – 2^nd and 3^rd grade. They were friends, too! And it all started over some stolen pieces of CookieCrisp: S got mad about it and stole Z’s picture. He wouldn’t give it back, so Z pushed him, and S punched back. That’s when I got in between them to stop it and keep them apart from each other. It was pretty intense – probably the most intense moment I’ve had all year in terms of adrenaline, even including the two days when I had to run the homework club by myself. The good thing is, when we brought their moms in to talk about it with them, there was no angry threatening language used toward the kids, and the resolution was not harsh punishment but rather an agreement between the boys that they were going to be friends, not enemies.

To celebrate St. Patty’s Day that night, we went over to the Philly house and had dinner with them and then went out to a bar in Old City. It wasn’t too crazy since it was a weeknight, although I didn’t get to bed until 2am…

Yesterday was fine, but I was super tired all day today, and didn’t have much patience for the kids. They kept on coming up to me and tattling on all the misbehavior that was going on: he said this to her, she used this word, she did this to him, he said this… most of these occurrences were happening in other rooms and not to the kids who were reporting it. I was trying to help kids do their homework, and my only reaction was to want to shout “I don’t care, stop bugging me!” I didn’t, but I was seriously annoyed. Once I got home, I just sat on the couch all evening feeling like a despondent lump and watched TV.

Thank goodness tomorrow is Friday.

Nor-easter

Big snow storm last night – a true “Nor-Easter”. Dumped about 5 inches on us here in Camden, more in other places. Pretty much every single school in South Jersey and Southeast PA was closed today. Cindy called in the morning to tell me she wasn't going to work today, so I decided to wait at least until it stopped snowing and the wind let up and the roads were better. Finally decided at 1:30 that there was no reason for me not to go in, but I was tired of sitting around. I made to the office at about 2:00 and left again at 4:15 so I wouldn't have to drive in the dark. Megan and I cooked up an Indian feast for dinner tonight: lentil dal, curried vegetables, basmati rice, banana raita...it all turned out great except for the chaptis...