frustration

Aren’t you supposed to come back from a retreat feeling refreshed and relaxed? But no, I was completely wiped out. It was great to see everybody again for the first time since August and it was lots of fun, but I didn’t get enough sleep. We had a couple really good community bonding and sharing moments, and the speakers and reflections got me reconnected, re-motivated, recommitted to the JVC values.

But since getting back, I’ve been feeling annoyed, frustrated, lonely, bored, and just generally unhappy with my community. We haven’t continued any of the conversations we started at retreat, nothing has changed – in fact, we haven’t even had a community or spirituality night since we got back.

I’m feeling alone in the challenge to seriously and intentionally live into the values of simplicity, social justice, community, and spirituality. It’s not because the others don’t care about those things, but they’re all at really different places in their lives than I am and I have a lot more experience with them than anyone else in my house. They're all exploring these things as a way of life for the first time, whereas I chose them because I knew it's how I wanted to live. I just have to learn to live with it...and be patient...and look for something I can do next year that will feel more serious to me...